Personal Trainer/Porn Star?

I entered the hallowed halls of the recreational center yesterday with much trepidation.  Looking around and seeing all sorts of body types was a little comforting.  I find I'm one of the few that is dressed for the outside.  Most people enter the facility dressed to workout leaving me to wonder what is wrong with the locker room.  I sit on the chairs and await my personal trainer porn star, Hunter.  I pick him out immediately as he approaches.  Yes, he is definitely muscle bound but as he gets closer the high and tight hair cut and boyish face belies his years, as do the marks of an active case of acne.  I almost busted out laughing.  Nope, he is no porn star.

I find out I am his first "client" as a personal trainer and so he stumbles through the assessment awkwardly trying to explain what each activity is suppose to reveal.  It was humorous to say the least.  My results were better in some areas than I thought and unremarkable in others.  According to my BMI, I am considered overweight, but my body fat percentage was within range for my age.  My cardiovascular capacity was just above a couch potato, no big surprise there.  But, I did 52 sit-ups in 60 seconds and was able to complete 20 push-ups and have a flexibility reach of 18 inches.  All three are in the excellent range. W00t!  I must say that the sit-ups did not involve coming up to a sitting position.  They now measure crunches and I was able to do the push ups from my knees, not toes.

So, Mr. Morgan is working on a training routine for me including 30 minutes of cardio and 30 minutes of weight training.  This should be interesting.  Oh and no, I did not embarrass myself with any loud noises.  I'm sure my body is waiting until I start work in the general population.

Would you rather
Not be allowed to wash your hair for a month
Or
Not be allowed to wash your hands for a month (not in the shower, not anywhere)?

Keep on Go!