Job Hunting Idiocy, part one

Okay, so I'm unemployed.  In order to get my weekly check, I need 5 job contacts per week.  Typically, this isn't hard to do: sit down on Sunday morning and go through Career Builder, Monster, etc. 

A lot of CAD jobs get posted by contract staffing agencies.  I've gotten more than one phone call from an agency recruiter that went something like this:

Agency: "Hello, may I speak to Dito, please?"
Dito: "Speaking."
A: "Hi, my name is Mary Jo Clueless.  I found your resume on Monster and wanted to talk with you."
D: "Okay, great."
A: "So, where did you work last?"
D: "Um, ABC Engineering."
A: "And how long did you work there?"
D: "Um, a little more than a year."
A: "And before that?"
D: "Hold on.  Isn't all this information on my resume?"
A: "It is, I just don't have it in front of me."
D: "I see."

... this goes on for my entire work history, skill set, education, references, etc., and ends like this:

Agency: "Okay, great.  Can I get your email address?"
Dito: "It's. On.  My.  Resume."
A: "Okay, no problem.  How about your home phone number?"
D: "You just called me at home."
A: "So this is the correct number to reach you?"
D: "Are you sure you're qualified to do technical staffing?"

I wish I was making this up.  I'm editorializing a little for effect, but it's really like this.  Just like I need to make 5 contacts per week for my paltry unemployment check, these recruiters must be required to make a certain number of phone calls per week to earn a commission or something.  The hardest part is trying to hold my tongue and not snap at these people, because I really do need a job.  It just really makes me wonder if they understand what I do, the differences between engineering disciplines, why all CAD software is not created equal, etc. 

In the next installment of Job Hunting Idiocy, you'll learn just how inspiring a 7-minute job interview can be.