Day Whatever

Good luck Durty, I hear that celery is negative calories, takes more energy to eat than they provide, if that helps any. Cigarettes are a bad habit, thats why I smoke a pipe.( A lot cheaper than smokes to be honest)

Screw that other stuff, here's what ya need to do. First, take a massive dip of Copenhagen, and shove it between yer cheek and gum. Then, light up a nice tasty ciggie, and smoke that mutha to the filter. Be sure not to snuff it out just yet though! Use the ciggie to light up a nice hand rolled stogie, preferrably one from a smoke shop. Between puffs on the stogie, replace the Copenhagen, and also every 10-15 minutes, use the stogie to light up a delicious, sweet tasting ciggie. Ahhhhhhhhh, feel your lungs take the smoke and give you all it's goodness? Oh yea, that's the ticket. In fact I need to light one right now. Oh yea, nice deep hit, I'm doing good now. Oh yea, repeat these helpful tips throughout the day as needed, they rock. Hey, people who make tobacco products need to eat too, so smoke 'em if ya got 'em!! Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!! PUN

I read in a fortune cookie that a journey of a million miles starts with a single step. Don't beat yourself up, just keep going.