On a bit of a downer lately

1.       Every day, tell my wife how much she means to me and how I don’t know what I’d do without her ….yes, she laughs and calls me gay….but still I’m going to say it.

2.       Find the time at work every day to stop, appreciate everything I have, and tell at least 2 of my co workers to fuck off (with a big smile on my face).

3.       Cut back on my productivity at work.  Screw them, they pay me like I’m a high school dropout, damn-it they aren’t getting my best anymore until they pay me for it.

4.       Go to the LAN. I need something to look forward to, and this is it….so long as it doesn’t sell out before next payday.

5.       Screw Politics. I hate politicians, both sides. Who’s right, who’s wrong, I don’t care anymore. And unless someone really stands out as being someone who has earned my vote, screw them all I’m done voting

6.       Start planning my exit strategy.  I don’t want to do this job forever; I know this isn’t what I’m supposed to do with my life.  I need to find what it is I want to do from now until I retire.

7.       We don’t need to get into #7, but let’s just say that the involved parties are aware of it….

8.       Start shooting more. I am part of a target shooting group here at work….the problem is that after starting the group almost 6 months ago, we have yet to get together and shoot.  So, I want to start shooting again and stop waiting around for someone else.

9.       Get more active.  The group in 2old4twinkies has been a massive help in getting myself up and moving on my goals, I’m down to the exact weight I was when I met my wife just about 9 years ago and it feels great.  But I want to lose about 50lb more by next year.

10.   Re-evaluate myself.  I find myself really questioning who I am.  Once I find the answer to that I expect a lot of other things in my life to fit together, all those little things that never had a purpose, or an outlet….I need to find me, and let him take over.

I’ve always held back on everything I’ve done, never feeling the need to work on something late into the night, never letting myself pour everything I had into a project, a job, or even any of the sports I played, I’ve always held something back and it’s time to find that one thing that I will believe in to the point that I will go all in and regardless of success or failure, I will really know who I am….I have ideas all the time, and while I can see each having the potential to be great, none of them draw me in with the desire and passion to give it my all.  That idea is what I seek from now on.

Auto out-