2old2play

The continuation of Profanity's adventure of infiltrating that great Timmy waste land, otherwise known as MLG.

Saturday 1:30am

We are on our way to my house from Speedbmp's to get a few hours of sleep before having to get up at 7am to get to the venue for warm-ups that being at 8am.

We're cruising along and I'm about to point out South Fork Ranch (where "Dallas" is based off of) when some red and blue lights start flashing behind us. Oh. Shit. You see, we were passing through Parker, TX. Aka - Po Dunk town USA. They love to ticket speeders. Unbeknownst to us, that was the least of our worries.

The officer comes up and asks Eks if he knew how fast he was going, wonders why he is driving a vehicle with Tennessee plates with an Arkansas license in Texas. The officer also asks Eks if he had been drinking that night. At first, Eks says no, but the Holy Spirit filled him with guilt and he quickly fessed up to having 2 drinks earlier in the evening. (around 8:30) Seemingly satisfied with the answer, he takes Eks' license back to his car to run a check.

After running Eks' license, the officer comes back, and since Eks looks like a mass-murderer, the officer asks Eks to step out of the vehicle. The next thing Smoke and I know, Eks is blowing into a breathalyzer. Oh. Shit. x2. But after a moment of panic, we both realize there is no way Eks should pop anything near the legal limit.

Sure enough, the officer lets Eks get back in the car and then explains to us he did it just to be safe and that all our eyes were bloodshot. (Well, duh! We've been looking at TV screens all day!) Turns out Eks blew a 0.01 and then the officer made him blow again to which he blew a 0.03. The officer laughed and gave the breathalyzer straw to Eks and said "Here's a souvenir from the state of Texas." and then let Eks off with a verbal warning about speeding 12 miles over the speed limit. Talk about luck! (To only get a verbal from a small-town cop in Texas for being 12 over is very rare.)

10 minutes later, we get home and get to bed for some sleep. I set my alarm for 7:20am. However, my daughter has climbed into bed with my wife leaving no room for me, so I go sleep in my daughter's bed.

8:30am

I wake up to my 4-year old daughter asking me why I'm in her bed. Check the time. HOLYSHIT!!! Warm-ups started 30 minutes ago!!! What the hell happened to my alarm I ask my wife. Her response: "Well, it kept going off and off, and you weren't getting up, so I shut it off." No shit I didn't get up, cause I didn't hear it, because I was in another room. Arghhhh....

We shower and get dressed and are on the road by 9am.

9am

I call Drost to see if they are there waiting for us. "Are you guys there waiting for us?" Drost: Laughs "No, we overslept! We got up at 8:30!" LOL... us old farts need our sleep I guess.

9:50am

We arrive at the venue and meet up with the other half of Profanity. Just in time to hear: "Get off the stations! Warm-up time is over! Referees will be shutting the stations down if people are still on them!" So much for warm-up time.

10am

MLG starts relaying station assignments over the PA. Our team is not called, so we will be playing in Heat 2 of Round 1.

In the mean time, we have a few laughs at some of the team names such as: Oh, Oh, It's Magic! Then, in what has to be one of the unlikely match-ups of the weekend, we hear: "Girls Got Game vs. Raped and Reloaded." Holy shit! They actually let a team name themselves that? Those two teams are actually seeded against one another? So we decide to go and watch that match. Girls Got Game even had a coach, which, in hind-site, would probably not be a bad idea. The coach can stand behind their team and watch their monitors and call out positions and what not.

[girlsgotgame]

Needless to say, these girls did not have game, and lost to the R&R team.

10:30am

Heat 2 for Round 1 is announced. Wait, that can't be right? Station 2???? That's the main stage! No! Please god! We are seeded 113 out of 128 (thanks to Malice) so we have to face the #16 seed in the bracket. We are not warmed up. We get crushed. The other team, MoB XG2K.com plays very similar to Str8 Rippin but not as tight or coordinated. But, a hell of a lot better then us.

Eks' phone rings. It's F1R3 telling him that he just watched us on VOD. Shit. Shit. Shit. That's the last place we wanted to be. At least against that competition.

[profanitycrew]

11am

Round 1 of the Loser's Bracket. We get our assignment again. Station #2 again!?!? WTF? Does MLG want to totally crush our moral and totally humiliate us? We get up there and wait 5 minutes. No other team. So we hop on and screw around to get a little bit warmed up. The other team never shows, and we win a match by forfeit!!! Not really the way I'd like to have won our first match, but you take what you can get. We are later notified that our screwing around was also on VOD. Christ almighty.

Our sponsor shows up. Yes, we had a sponsor. He couldn't give much, but what he did give offset the entry fee for the event.

11:30am

Round 2 of the Loser's Bracket. Finally! We aren't on the Main Stage anymore! Hurray! And, if we win this round, we won't have to play split-screen anymore! We blew it. The game started to feel good for me and I started to click in this match, but it was too little, too-late. We can't pull out a win. It just shows how important it is to adjust to split screen play on a small TV as early as possible, as well as get as much warm-up as you can before your matches.

Noon

We hang around and watch a few more matches. We realize it may look creepy for us to be standing behind a team of teenage girls while they play. We move to another station.

Then Drost decides he needs a drink. We retire to a Tex-Mex joint where we down our sorrows in margaritas and chips. We decide to retire to Speedbmp's for the afternoon with the plan of going back to the venue to watch the Pro FFA and beginning of the Pro 4v4.

2pm

Eks is crashes and so does Drost. Malice, Caligula, and I hop onto Live to screw around. Then, someone comes up with this idea: Why go back to the venue and stand around when we can stay here on these comfortable couches, drink beer, and watch VOD fed through Speedbmp's High-Def TV? Great idea! Beer runs are made, Speedbmp hooks up VOD and feeds it through the TV.

We watch what we can over VOD, but due to a crappy connection on MLG's end, it continues to drop on us. We do get to see some of the Pro FFA and that was some good stuff.

Meanwhile, Caligula and I play some more on XBL, and his 10 year old son logs in and joins us in a custom game. His son kills me. his son facehumps me. WTF Caligula? What have you been teaching your kid!?!?!? I hunt the little shit down and proceed to return the favor.

We continue to play around on Live into the night and finally call it a night and head home around 1am.

Sunday 10am

We sleep in. None of us really have any enthusiasm to go to the venue today. Eks and Smoke decide to hit the road as it is a 5 hour drive to Arkansas. Drost and Co. are at the movies watching "The Da Vinci Code" so he can write another one of his uplifting reviews. This pretty much ends Profanity's great adventure at MLG. I monitor the MLG boards for updates as to who is doing what throughout the day, as I am too much of a cheap-ass to buy VOD.

2pm

Eks calls. He just got pulled over by a Texas State Trooper for speeding 7 miles over the limit. The trooper gives him a written warning and lets him go. Eks goes 2-0 against Texas Law. At least one of us won something. :-)