Reynolds Wrap versus Sandpaper

So Rabb has me thinking.

If I could only choose between Reynolds Wrap and Sandpaper to wipe my ass for the rest of my life..which would I choose? I have a unlimited supply, so here's where it gets interesting.

Sandpaper: Pro's. Durability, you won't be dipping into the puddin with sandpaper that's for sure. Cons: Anything with to low of a Grit count and you are going to sore at the least, and bleeding like a 120lb white guy in prison.

Reynolds Wrap: 1)Cellophane: Pro: Definately smoother. Cons: You are going to be on a bigger smear campaign than this years presidential runs. 2)Aluminum Foil, much like cellohphane, you are going to be spreading the joy around for a while. Cons, you are much more likely to accidently turn your butt into a modified bowling ball grip if you push to hard. Also, foil tends to form wrinkles and I would worry about getting the ass hair pinched and pulled...yeow!

The otherthing about Reynolds wrap, its going to be, as Rabb phrased it once, like trying to rub peanut butter out of a shag carpet.

I'd have to say, if I had a unlimited supply, I'd go with the cellophane, having myself flean might require more product, but at least I would be able to sit down afterwards.

If I had a limit on how much I could use, I'd have to go with a Sandpaper witha higher grit count, at least you could cut it into strips and move slowly to cut down on chaffing.