Why play Bioshock Infinite on the Xbox when…

You can play it in your basement in the dark. All you need/to do are/is:

A tub of Vaseline

Crank the thermo state to 90 degrees

Turn on the smoke machine

Disco Lights, lots of disco lights

Fry some fish

Plug in the hot plate and boil water constantly

Play the Pretenders in the back ground

Record sounds of a pro baseball pitcher throwing Granny Smith Apples at a wall and play that on high

Rig up a jet engine to your downstairs window and fire it up

Scream for ten hours straight

And some smelling salts for when your loved ones eventually discover where you’ve been for the past 72 hours…