Random Thoughts...

by Mortimer.

1.  My grandfather once gave me some great advice that I live by to this day.  He said to me "It's a lot easier getting it out of the hole, than it is to put it in".  How true.  I've been addicted to golf ever since then.

2.  Sometimes I like to let my toenails grow just to see how long it will take for me to need to get shoes one size bigger.

3.  Anyone ever heard of Idaho Spud candy?  I have some here, I'm worried it's a chocolate covered potato.

4.  I bet Dan Quayle still can't spell potato.

5.  Someone needs to tell MC Hammer he's still 2 legit, 2 legit 2 quit.

6.  I play games down in my basement, I use a PC monitor for my screen and have a 19' TV next to me.  Last night while playing Rock Band I saw what could become the next greatest sport ever, Topless Female Bumper Car Championships.  This must come to fruition.

7.  Speaking of TV the other night I was watching Keeping up with the Kardashians.  I wanted to masturbate and hated myself at the same time.  I was conflicted.

8.  I've often found that Tripper had it right all along, it just doesn't matter. 

9.  I still don't know what to call a tramp stamp if the tramp has the stamp on the front side.

10.  One time at work I had a colleague ask me why I didn't want to go to lunch with "the gang".  Not knowing any other way to say it I told him I just don't like people.  To this day he still doesn't speak to me.  I call that a win.

11.  At this point I bet you're wondering, why am I still reading this, I have more important things to do.

12.  I'm out of stuff for now.