Gym Observations

S
SoupNazzi

So, I bought a membership to a gym near where I work.  It's less then a block away, so I can just head on over there and get a work out in before I head home. 

I've been told that if you've ever exercised extensively in your life, and then stopped for a long duration, and then came back, that your body will remember and adjust quicker then someone who has never exercised in their life and is just starting.

I haven't done any true exercising in over a year.  Hopped on the Eliptical and kicked out 45 minutes, 500 calories and 4.5 miles.  I'm pretty damn proud of myself!  Next up however, is weights, which I haven't done in over 10 years and swimming which I haven't done in over 15 years.  Pain is good.  Pain is your friend.  LOL.

Anyways...

Locker rooms.  God I hate locker rooms.  I don't really know why.  I think it's the slight OCD in me and the thought of all the nasty ass germs on the floors of a locker room.  Or, it could be the naked guys walking around with their junk swinging in the wind like they don't have a care in the world.  Seriously dude!  I don't want to look up from putting my shoes on to look straight at your junk because it's in my direct line of sight!

But my overall favorite happened today.  Well, favorite maybe the wrong word.  Scarred for life possibly?

I get done with my eliptical workout, and I'm sitting in the locker room trying to cool off and getting my clothes out and getting ready to leave.  I bring an extra towel because the gym towels suck ass, and the one that they give me is already soaked from my workout.  So I'm sitting on the bench with the towel over my head and just winding down.

I look up, and there is some 60+ year old man, butt-ass naked standing directly in my line of sight.  WTF?  He's trying to figure out the scale.  He hops on, and realizes that he can't read the numbers so he asks someone for some help.  I duck my head and just listen as someone comes over and reads his weight for him.  I'm sneak a peak, and some dumb schlub is right next to him reading it for him...  Then I duck my head back down.

I hear him get off the scale and think to myself, "great, it's all clear now, and I can look up like a normal person."  My mistake.

I look up, and he's still right in front of me, with his back toward me...  only, he's bending over to pick something up.  Right.  In.  Front.  Of.  Me.

The only thing that goes through my head in that moment is...  GOATSE.CX

Because that's almost what it looked like. 

Next time, I'm getting a locker far away from the showers and the scale...  lesson learned.

Comments (8)

D
Devonsangel·
LMAO
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TDrag27·
I once watched a women lift up her foot and chew, yes chew, a blister or some kind of shit off of her foot in a gym locker room. It was fucked up.
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ekattan·
Dude when you start weight training again your biggest obstacle will be getting to wipe your own ass. I remember when I did weights in college, my body hurt so much and got so stiff when you start working out. Wiping my ass was the hardest thing to do.
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Durty·
Lmao!
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Cranefolder·
And THAT, ladies and gentlemen, is why I have my own home gym! \r \r Now if I would only start actually USING it...
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Mandingo·
Lifting used to be my thing. I got married, had a kid,moved 4-5 times and ended up taking 5 years off. Starting back up has been one of the most discouraging and difficult things ever. You think you have a good work out but its hard not to compare it against the past and call yourself a wuss. stick with it man, it gets easier/more enjoyable the more you do it. the first month or so is the make it or break it period.
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J-Cat·
A friend of mine at work was complaining about he same thng. But htis guys was towelling off: he would put one leg up on the bench... and bend over... ew....
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LadiesLuvMe·
The reason you don't like going into the locker room is because you have a little ding-ding :)