Da Roundup

Video supposedly shows terror camp 'grad day'

Muhalla al Hassan denied diploma over excessive ululating by family.

Missing pregnant woman was excited about baby

Compared to majority of woman ambivolent about babies

Google pushing 100-mpg car

I would probably call that cheating.  Car may not be pushed.

Spears' mother: She's 'figuring things out'

Blue’s Clues, Where’s Waldo, the benefits of panties, etc…

Projectionist pans movie, loses job

If everyone who disses the new Fantastic Four movie loses their job, the unemployment rate will be crippling…

Teacher Probed for Alleged Affair With Boy

Isn’t that how it started in the first place?

Vatican Issues 10 Commandments For Drivers

Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s lane

Firefighters flush kitten from storm drain

Can’t quite come up with the joke, but when I do it will definitely involve the words “douche” and “pussy.”

Indiana Scientist Wins World Food Prize

I didn’t click on the link, but I’m guessing it’s for a breakthrough innovation in deep-frying technology.

Bikini Model Turns Newswoman for Fox Reality Show 'Anchorwoman'

“Fair and Balanced” can’t hold up to “Blonde and Stacked.”

Boy Scout Camper Killed by Falling Totem Pole

Pretty shitty jamboree…

Spiked Male Genitals Spur Beetle Evolution

Wow. This is right out of “Seven.” Ladies, be glad you’re not seed beetles

'Manhunt 2' banned for 'casual sadism'

I’ve always preferred my sadism “black tie”

Obama Apologizes for 'Punjab' Jab

However, refuses to make amends for “David Lee Roth” hurricane kick.