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Cursed

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SoupNazzi

My house is cursed.

Woke up this morning to find that my refrigerator went out sometime in the night.  That's the 2nd time this year.  Add to that out AC going out 3 times in the past 4 years, our dryer going out, (1) TV blowing out, and (1) Xbox going out, and I'm thinking the house is cursed.

But it's more likely some sort of electrical issue.  So, more money out the door to get it fixed.  Yay me!

Firefight In Afghanistan Caught over the phone.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4goOzg0lass[/youtube]

Random Offenses

Did you hear what the dyslexic Highway Patrolman did on New Year's? He spent the whole night handing out I.U.D.s

One night at the dinner table, Jill commented, "When we were first married, you took the small piece of steak and gave me the larger. Now you take the large one and leave me the smaller. You don't love me any more!" "Nonsense, darling," replied John. "You just cook better now."

Girl: Do you believe in puppy love? Boy: I tried it once, but their assholes are too small.

Two Iranians meet in Miami. One starts to greet the other in Farsi, the language of their native country.The other Iranian waved him away contemptuously and said, "We're in America now. Speak Spanish!"

"Doc, I can't stop singing 'The green, green grass of home.'" "That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome." "Is it common?" "It's not unusual."

If God didn't intend for us to have oral sex, why are penises shaped like hotdogs and vaginas like tacos?

Mr. and Mrs. Cload came before the judge for their divorce hearing. The judge asked, "What are the grounds?" Mrs. Cload replied, "Cruel and inhuman punishment, your Honor. He tied me to the bed and then forced me to sing "Raindrops Keep Falling On My Head" while he pissed all over me." The judge shuddered and said, "Good God, that's disgusting!" "Damn right, your Honor," Mrs. Cload yelled. "He knows how much I hate that fucking song!"

Went to the sex shop the other day and bought a Palestinian sex doll. When I got it home, it blew itself up.

Why does a dog lick his ass? Because he knows he will be licking your face in about 5 minutes.


Comments (13)

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DreadPirate75·
How to permanently fix your AC problems:\r \r Move to Alaska.\r \r \r I feel your pain...I live in an apt. with no AC at all. But in SoCal its the dry heat that gets ya.
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H2Daddy·
I am in the same boat brother. Everything at my house keeps breaking. Washing machine, 360, and air conditioner. What's next?
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OldManRiver48·
Damn Soup, thats frustrating-my best man.\r \r ps-dont listen to DP75 as that would totally ruin your workout/training. Not sure what happens there but I've heard of 98 pound weaklings going to Alaska, and returning as a husky fucker!
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Speedbump·
You sure do bitch a lot.
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wilderz·
Yeah we lived in an apartment where the indoor temp never got under 85 degrees in the summer! I had to actually threaten the leasing office with the department of health as we had black mold on our deck from our leaking a/c unit. \r \r Luckily the house we are renting now is owned by a guy that runs his own AC/heating company.\r \r Hang in there man..make a list and check off whatever you can get done. It's all technical difficulties, just keep that in mind.
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Patty·
Bummer. You could live here tho... it snowed 2 days ago. It's only 40-something degrees outside and that's an improvement over yesterday. I would love some AC weather! You can have mine...at this rate, I wont' ever need it.
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Caesar·
yeah im thinking its more of an electrical problem\r my microwave kept going out and i went downstairs and checked the trip they had a 15 when they needed a 20 .
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KLIK·
You may want to call your electric company and have them check it out. A friend of mine worked for ours and said that they will do that kind of thing.
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th3midnighter·
have you checked the plug on yoru electric vibrator? Stridog told me he had the same issue and he just had to replace his vibrator with a battery operated dildo. lol
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utmountnbiker·
Do your light bulbs last a short time? If so, that is the first indication of an electrical problem as they are usually the most sensitive. You may need to add a whole house line conditioner/surge supressor to eliminate the issue. I've seen the for under $100, but not sure which is the best choice. Good luck! Sucks to pay to fix/replace crap.
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TDrag27·
Do you know what the agnostic, dyslexic, insomniac did all night? He stayed up wondering if there really is a dog.
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SoupNazzi·
Nah, I use CFLs for all my bulbs.
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MGK·
Make sure your neutral is grounded. If it isn't, you're going to get more and less than 120V depending on what is plugged in. Appliances aren't meant to operate much higher than 120V.