Bathroom Etiquette

Since Tait provided a few of the rules, I thought I would provide another one with a short anecdote:

#6) Don't TALK ON THE PHONE while on the toilet! I don't want to hear you grunting, whizzing, farting, flushing, or hear the sound of toilet paper coming off it's roll when I'm speaking to you.

This afternoon, after lunch, I made my usual trip to the toilet. I sit down in my favorite stall, and prep to do my business.

The next stall is occupied.

Normally, I would have some reading material to ease the passing. But I didn't take the time to print anything out, so I flipped out my phone and connected it to the internet and went to CNN.

I start reading a story about a 5 year old Iraqi boy who was doused in gasoline and burned by insurgents, when all of a sudden, I hear; "Hello?" "Hello?" "Hello?" coming from the next stall.

Douche is on his phone.

Then... "Hello?"

PLOP
SPLASH

"Hello?"

PLOP
SPLASH

"Hello?"

FLUSH (courtesy flush)

First off, WTF are you doing talking on the phone while dropping a dookie? I mean really. Is that something that the person on the other end of the line needs to hear? These weren't a typical plop-splash. This guy was dropping teenage kids off at the pool.

Secondly - WTF are you doing talking on the phone in a public bathroom? I don't want to hear your phone conversation in a restaurant, I sure as hell don't want to hear it while I'm doing my bidness!

Lastly - Hello? Hello? Hello? How many fucking times do you have to say / ask before you realize that the other person is aghast at what they are hearing, or simply not there?

Needless to say, I cut my visit short and got out of there so I wouldn't have to continue listening to him.

Have some couth people!

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I Think That Guy over There Pissed